Pretty and Sick

cover‘You’re pretty young to be an assassin.’

‘You don’t need to be old.’ She laughs. ‘Though, assassin isn’t really the right word. I’m more of a … jack of all trades.’

‘Some kind of killing renaissance lady, if you will.’

‘Exactly.’

Sera meets Aimee in a nightclub. Aimee’s going to blow up the nightclub. Pretty and Sick is 10k words of them running, kissing each other and killing people. Available now for pay what you want (including $0) on gumroad!

(some NSFW content)

Ida

I am absolutely delighted to tell you that I have signed a contract with Echo Publishing for my novel IDA, to be released in Jan 2017. I wrote the first draft in 2011, if you’ve been following me on twitter then you’ve probably seen me talk about it BUT I thought I would post something here as well.

ida

Ida is a figuring out what to do with her life. This is complicated by the fact that she has the ability to live out the alternatives to the choices she makes, by travelling between parallel universes. This has never really been a problem until one day when she sees a shadowy, see-through doppelganger of herself on the train. Is Ida actually in control of her ability? And how far will she stray from her original path before she realises there are no choices left?

This is an intelligent and entertaining novel that explores love and loss, and speaks to the contemporary condition of an array of overwhelming, and often illusory, possibilities.

So it’s a very fun book, lots of MYSTERY and whatnot. (And of course there are many queers in it because why wouldn’t there be. Also a fun fact: there are six main charcaters and four of them are trans, something I’m noting because 1. it is important for trans characters to be present and 2. it is trans day of visibility!)

Sticky Institute’s one millionth photocopy party

next friday (the 27th of nov) Sticky Institute are having a SUPER MEGA FUN AWESOME zine launch of many many zines because they just passed their millionth photocopy since they opened in 2011.

There are so many excellent peeps launching stuff, some of whom are very dear friends o mine: Alison Evans  (it me!) ~ Andy Wear ~ Astrid ~ Audrey El-Osta ~ Bloomurder ~ Carla Adams ~ Frank Candiloro ~ Gemma Flack ~ Heard ~ John Stevens ~ Kate Greenaway ~ Katherine Pigott ~ Li-Kim Chuah ~ Luke You ~ Richard Pilkington ~ Samantha Riegl ~ Shane Jesse Christmas ~ Sophie Benjamin ~ Steven J Finch ~ Tegan Webb ~ Thomas Blatchford ~ Tim Ungaro …and more.

… and it’ll be great. If you’re in Melbourne you should definitely come check it out! It’ll be at Sticky, which is in the Degraves subway. you check out the facebook event or their tumblr for more info!!!!

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concrete queers #2

I co-edit a zine called Concrete Queers and our second issue is being launched on Saturday the 8th! Issue #2 is the comedy issue so it’s got has got comedians talking about their craft, people talking about what comedy means to them, as well as queers just bein’ plain darn funny and producing fabulous artwork.

cq2For the first issue, we asked our friends to help us out with submissions and it was amazing. This issue, we opened up a general submissions call and we got some AMAZING stuff from people we haven’t met!!! and now we get to show it all off.

The launch is at the ever-perfect Sticky Institute in the Degraves Subway in Melbourne on the 8th of August from 3-5pm. The Facebook event is here.

Cover image by Mitucami Mituca, design by Tiffany Street.

Long macchiatos and monsters

geekoutSo I have a book coming out today! how neat! It’s part of a collection by Less Than Three Press called Geek Out. Every story is about geeky trans people so naturally it is literally the best collection ever probably.

My story, Long Macchiatos and Monsters, is about Jalen, who is a cute non-binary person who really really likes bad sci-fi movies and is our narrator. They meet P, a too-attractive-for-his-own-good trans man, in a cafe one day after deciding whether or not to skip uni.

The whole story is secretly a love letter to Melbourne.

Melbourne is basically one giant cafe. You leave one cafe and then after a few minutes walking, you stumble into another one. This is why my two main characters meet in a cafe, because there are legit no other places in Melbourne. Everything is a cafe.

lmmb8We in Melbourne are obsessed with coffee for reasons I don’t quite understand, but I am very thankful because it means the coffee is generally great. Even if you don’t drink coffee, you are probably an expert if you live in Melbourne.

A long macchiato here is two shots of espresso with a circle of frothed milk on the top. I also work as a barista, and this is my least favourite kind of coffee to make.

P’s coffee order is a long macchiato because he is a pretentious asshole (In a good way. I do love him). Jalen’s order is a plain an’ simple latte, because they’re not a jerk.

“Can I try it?” I ask.

He raises an eyebrow, grins. “If you’re brave enough.”

We swap coffees and I smell his. Bitter, warm. I take a
sip and oh, god, this was a mistake. It barely touches my tongue before the taste is everywhere. I scrunch up my mouth and we swap back.

“You’re disgusting,” I choke out before  drinking some of mine to wash down the taste.

“You can talk, you milk-drinking pleb.”

We are very serious about coffee here.

You can buy Long Macchiatos and Monsters right [here] if you would like! Less than three dollary dos for a story about super cute hilarious trans cuties kissing that is all secretly about my love of coffee and Melbourne.

ps. Cecil Wilde’s story in the collection, Defying Convention is legit super cute.

Review: No Limit by Holly Childs

nolimit_webThe blurb of No Limit (2014) says it’s told in “sugar-rush prose” and this sums it up pretty well. This is a novella that kind of reads like you’re browsing the internet. You’ve got twitter open, tumblr, you’re IMing ten different people and writing a few emails at the same time.

Ash, our main character, is on a connecting flight from Auckland when a volcanic eruption begins and her flight is grounded indefinitely. Is it the apocalypse? Maybe. She’s not going to die at the airport, so she gets a taxi out of there.

There’s not a lot of action and we mostly watch as Ash travels with people she barely knows (including the dream girl she passed at the airport) around a city she doesn’t know. There are apocalypse parties, bathroom orgies, internet cafes. There’s twitter, tumblr, skype, facebook, texting. This is how you write about the internet.

The prose can be intense, super vivid, with sprawling sentences:

After walking super slowly for about twenty metres in absolute blackness, dark enough that Ash can’t tell if her eyes are open or closed, and Mack is having flashbacks to his shit dad preaching on the horrors of death’s kingdom, and Ash has to spit the Skittles out of her mouth because they taste to intense without colour, and Mack thinks that maybe this is the final solution–after all that, they turn a corner and see rainbow oscillating light illuminating a pile of bricks from behind a gap in the wall and the beat gets louder, louder. (p45)

The book is only eighty five pages long and Childs sustains the fierce style throughout, any longer and it may not have worked.

Another super great thing is all the queer representation — almost every character is either non-hetero or non-cis and it’s never really a big thing. No labels are really used and sometimes that can read terribly, but here in this clever, fast-paced, surreal maybe-apocalypse world, it works.

No Limit is published by Hologram and you can buy it here.

5/5 stars

Queermance vol. one

Hey peeps, I have a new story out! How exciting. From the 21st to the 23rd of March, the very first Queermance writers conference was held and it was pretty fab.

There was also an anthology produced, which I was super lucky to be in!

My story, I Blame the Cat, was the first erotica I’d even attempted, and turns out I’m not too terrible at it which is nice! People even laughed at my jokes when I read it out at the launch on Friday!  (I have discovered that while doing readings is terrifying it’s also really lovely because I think writing is a very solitary practice and sharing your things to an immediate audience is just A+.)

In the anthology there’s also a story set in post-apocalyptic Brisbane, one featuring selkies, another featuring vampires, and there’s lots of humour and other cool things in there.

You can get the ebook from Clan Destine Press, Amazon or Smashwords if you like!

Comic happenings

So my friend is super good at drawing and we decided we wanted to do a thing together, so a webcomic is happening! We’ve planned out the first year of storylines and I’m in the process of writing chapter one.

The basic premise is that a vampire, werewolf, fairy and ghost have just moved in together. Now, that’s been done before a few times, but what we’re doing is a lot of silly nonsense, really.

None of this dark vampire underground business, none of these grisly murders, just a bunch of twenty somethings living together trying to live, really, just with some added features like fangs and monthly transformations into hairy beasts. Y’know, whatevs.

I’m not sure when this’ll all be up, but if you like comics that are:

  • hilarious (hopefully my jokes are funny to other people)
  • set in Melbourne
  • full of queers
  • and diversity!!!!
  • free to read

… then you should watch this space!

On ebooks

I was with a couple of friends in the city today and we were looking at this free trust library:

It was very cool. (For those in Melbourne, this is in Melbourne Central kind of near the Converse shop and under the giant clock-ish.)

Anyway, there was this guy who decided to give me a lecture on ebooks there and I was pissed off about it but I have this terrible urge to be polite to ALL the strangers so I’m just going to rant a little bit here because of reasons.

First off, I don’t have a dog so don’t give me this shit about how books can withstand a dog biting them. I’m sorry, sir, but this is a ridiculous point. I have no plans to put my iPhone into a dog’s mouth. Was there any particular reason as to why it had to be a German shepherd?

I also do not have a child, so your point about having a toddler smash my phone does not apply. Also, I’m pretty sure I would be keeping an eye on my child if they were holding something very expensive if they were that young.

I do want to read in the bath, yes. I can take my phone into the bath, it’s really not that hard. I’m not going to drop it. I’ve read plenty of “real” books in the bath and I haven’t dropped any of those.

And my last point, I’m not going to read ebooks on my iPhone, jesus christ, do you take me for a fool? (Although clearly you do, as I am an e-reading heathen who deserves to be shot.) I have a kindle. It uses e-ink in its screen. It may run out battery but it can last for a month, which is pretty impressive.

And, by the way, I purchase a lot of books per year that are not second-hand, from op-shops or bought online. I go into a fucking book shop and buy them because I want to support the industry I am a part of. I buy ebooks, too, because sometimes books are just not available in Australia or the shipping is too expensive.

And buying ebooks helps the industry, too. Did you know that some publishers solely publish ebooks? Shocking! The horror! Won’t somebody think of the children! Are we living in some kind of sick, twisted future in which we read soulless books because of the lack of dead trees? Maybe some publishing houses don’t publish print books because they can’t afford it. And maybe some people don’t buy print books because they can’t afford them.

It doesn’t matter how people read books, it only matters that they do.

Sir, you were impolite. I tried to joke with you but clearly you are a being far superior to I. I’m sure you will pen the next bestseller and go on to revolutionise the world with your vision.